Could I say that today was any different than any other day I have managed to withstand? Probably not. Yet, I simply can not help but be over come with a great sense of understanding on the car rides home from school.
I realize now, that it is fear that paralyzes me. Self-concious fear. I, as a Virgo ascendent, can not withbear the chance that I may not be good enough for a certain situation. I am utterly shocked and appalled that I could not overcome this, seemingly childish, fear, and still I cannot. I am afraid that I will not be good enough, and as such, whoever watched me fail will immediately cast me off into the oblivion of their minds, never wishing to visit me again. With this, since I have lost so many friends within the past year, I worry that I might just collapse and implode from lack of words to say. Once a friend leaves, I'm afraid, it becomes a near impossible task to try to catch them again.
I feel a drum in my heart;
it is the beat of my life.
With each note,
I am one step closer to death
and one step closer to purpose.
The drum changes tunes;
each day is a passing song.
For I am only the Earth,
and only a rhythm of life.
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