There are only four days until he leaves.
I won the second poker game. It wasn't very likely, and I wasn't counting on it, but it all works out to my favor. Except for those two girls. But, this is high school drama and if those bitches want to fuck with me, they can just come and try. And Dear God, she looks so ugly with her bitch face. And I was there, ready to give her an honest, wholesome chance. I'm very shy with girls (especially new people) and she just wrote me off. Well, fine. But trust me, girl, you did not make any friends be a clammed-up bitch.
It's weird. I think I just get a little defensive about it because I know that he liked her. She's known him for forever, and he would never have been with me if she was waiting for him. However, she has no hope now. Yet, there is this ever present jealousy of what they shared and what could have been for them. And how, maybe, if he got too drunk (or something) she could win him back. No matter how much I don't like being jealous, it just happens. And I worry. I don't want to lose him.
I don't know what to say. TO either of you. The transition has come, and I have my voice now. I am ready to use it.
You won't push me down.
'Many memories create a dream,
many hopes create it.
What we remember is really what we've forgotten.
And, if you forget me,
will you remember what we have?'
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